


iCan't Believe I'm Falling For You

by myjumpingsocks



Category: iCarly
Genre: Drama, Friendship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2011-11-07
Updated: 2011-12-11
Packaged: 2015-07-24 12:48:14
Rating: T
Chapters: 4
Words: 11,717
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/7533075/1/
Author URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/u/2094406/myjumpingsocks
Summary: Missy, Nevel, and other enemies of iCarly band together to bring the trio down. Will they succeed, or will fate get in the way? Seddie, and other suprise couples.





	1. This Was No Accident

**Hey guys! For readers of iCan Make Her Jealous, this is an all new story! It does have Seddie in it, but other couples will heavily involved too. **

**This story never would have happened without _hartful13_! He is an angel, this story is dedicated to him! It never would have happened without him, he completely took my one stupid little thought and gave me this fantastic idea! I kind of went a little crazy with it, but it still never would have happened without him. **

**KingxLeon21, what would I do without you as my wise and speedy fast beta? You're amazing too.**

**One last thing, all these chapter titles will be from Panic! At The Disco songs. This one steals a line from Camisado :)**

* * *

><p>The dimly lit coffee shop was, fairly, unoccupied. It wasn't exactly cozy but it wasn't repelling either. It wasn't a typical place for teenagers; most would have been at a fast food restaurant or maybe an Italian place with great lasagna. However, neither of these teenagers were normal. The boy sat at a table, dressed in khakis and a plaid sweater. His hair; styled with gel in a way that only be described as dorky, and he was a few pounds overweight, wearing his usual sour expression. He did not enjoy the company of other teenagers, and would have much preferred to be at home working on his website or coming up with a way to trick Carly Shay into kissing him. Hopefully, this would be worth his while. The girl entered; shaking off the Seattle rain and smiling to herself. She spotted the boy quickly, and upon arriving at the table removed her long jacket, revealing a plain v-neck pink shirt and a pair of skinny jeans. Normally both teens would have tried harder to impress the opposite sex, but this was not a date.<p>

"What do you want?" the boy's sharp, brisk voice sounded higher in pitch and was more mature than most teenagers. Both knew he wasn't talking about coffee. The girl raised an eyebrow at his abruptness, but let it settle into a smug smile. She clearly thought she had the upper hand in the situation, and the boy strongly disagreed.

"What I want is what you want; to take down iCarly," she said this with an air of drama, expecting her words to silence him, but the boy, Nevel, just nodded. "So you're Missy, I gather."

The redhead blinked in surprise. "How do you know about me?" she was immediately suspicious of his calm attitude.

"I keep tabs on everything I can regarding Carly, Sam and Freddie. I figured one day you'd come find me," he stated rather calmly, actually talking to the spoon he was using to examine his hair. He wasn't proud of his near-stalkish activities regarding the trio, but he wasn't ashamed either. Nevel always assured himself that he kept an eye on them, not because of Carly, but to find a weakness, and use it to bring them down.

A few seconds of silence passed. The girl, Missy, was most likely trying to wrap her head around this and figure out what to say. Instead, Nevel broke the silence.

"Would I be correct in assuming that you have some sort of delightful plan to get revenge on iCarly for wronging you, and that you need my help to pull it off?" he smirked at her from the across the table, and her face burned bright red.

"Not just you," she snapped, "It'll take more than that. I'm trying to get as many people to help as possible. You're just one of the people I'm seeking out, so don't be so smug."

"Who are the others?" asked Nevel curiously.

"So far I've gotten a hold of Chuck and Mr. Howard." Missy looked pleased with herself.

"And what exactly is their part in this operation?" Nevel questioned casually.

Missy opened her mouth to speak before stopping herself, sending Nevel a glare. "I'm not telling you anything else until you agree to help."

Nevel leaned back in his chair. "I'm in, but what is your motive? The rumors are that you got pushed out of iCarly, but no further details ever surfaced."

Missy's eyes darkened. "This isn't just for me. It's for everyone. Someone has to put those losers in their place. They think that just because they do a webshow the rules don't apply to them and they can get away with anything. Sam ruined my chances of reconnecting with Carly, Freddie sent me on the cruise from hell, they tortured Chuck, got him sent to math camp, nearly got Mr. Howard fired, cheated you out of a kiss and made you look like an idiot. It's about time someone took them down."

Missy leaned back in her seat from which she had moved away from. Nevel let her words settle over him, before taking a deep breath and replying, "I agree with all of those statements completely. So, how will we do it?"

The girl's smug grin returned. "Easy. You pull people apart from each other, break the trust, and taint the happiness, then stand back and watch the relationships crumble."

* * *

><p>Mr. Howard flexed his fingers nervously, spreading them apart then drawing them into a tight fist one final time before he wrapped them around his coffee mug. Thanks to information from Chuck, Missy had learned a lot about the iCarly trios' parents and their relationships with them. Carly's were kind of out of the picture, Sam's was a disaster, and Freddie's was an overprotective near psychopath. On top of that, he had informed Missy that Sam and Freddie's mothers drove them crazy, and he had reason to believe that Sam and Freddie might couple up soon, much to the dismay of his mother. It was with that limited knowledge, that Missy had formed the strangest part of her plan. All he had to do was follow her instructions and hope that the shabby plan came together.<p>

Not a man to lie anymore, Mr. Howard easily admitted that this portion of Missy's plot didn't make sense to him. He knew that the point was to eventually drive the iCarly crew apart and make them alone, but he still wondered if maybe his part of the plan was to only cause entertainment when Nevel, undoubtedly, failed at his.

Mr. Howard turned his attention back to the two ladies he was supposed to be watching. Mrs. Puckett was shamelessly flirting with a rather unattractive balding man who alternated between nodding at her questions, and staring at her boobs. The other female, Mrs. Benson sat a short distance away, socializing with no one and alternating between applying hand sanitizer and looking with distaste at Pam.

The teacher took a final chug of his coffee, then, stepped forward in front of a sign that read _Welcome Members of the All New Ridgeway Parents Association! _

"Hello, everyone. It seems like you all have arrived so I'll get started. This is the first Ridgeway Parents Meeting, but we hope to have one every month and use this time to discuss the school our children attend, and give ideas to help improve their value of learning." Principal Franklin had been pretty surprised when Mr. Howard had stepped forward to run a new meeting of parents to help better the school, but if it helped carry out Missy's plan and secure his job, it was worth it.

Everyone clapped at his little speech and he continued, "To celebrate I purchased us a large sheet cake from the Drake and Josh bakery," everyone applauded again. This time, more enthusiastically. "Would one of you lovely ladies please assist me in cutting this cake?"

Most of the women tittered nervously and giggled, but one blonde shot up from her seat. "I'll do it, I'm hot." Pam Puckett's voice shut everyone else up, and Mr. Howard beamed at her.

Pam got to the front of the room, where Mr. Howard revealed a large vanilla cake and handed her the knife to cut it, taking care to handle the knife by its blade. Pam grabbed the handle of the knife, slick with unseen butter, and it tumbled to the floor, its journey only briefly interrupted when it nicked Pam's left hand.

"Holy fucking llamas!" Pam screamed at the exact moment Marissa Benson shot up from her seat. Mr. Howard resisted the urge to squeal like a little fangirl at the perfection.

"Don't move Pam, I'm a nurse." Marissa pushed her way past the gasping people crowding around and got to the blonde's side.

"Can you fix it?" Mr. Howard asked in his most concerned voice. The cut ran from the near top of her index finger, down the side, just past her knuckle.

Marissa nodded briskly. "Yes, it's not bad; should only take a stitch or two. Thank goodness I brought my first aid kit!"

Pam backed up, holding her finger possessively. "No, no, no, no, no one is performing surgery on my finger without a lot of drugs and a really hot doctor!"

Marissa smiled tenderly at Pam and took her hand, a surprised look shooting through both of them when she did, as if there was an unexpected jolt. Mr. Howard grinned deliciously. Missy's plan was coming together flawlessly.

"I know you hate hospitals. You're practically famous in the one I work at for having an awful time while you're there. I can fix it quickly and then it can be over and done with." Pam managed a weak smile and nodded at her companion, looking down at Marissa's hand clutching hers.

"Why don't you two go up to the chemistry lab so you can stitch her up? It's very clean and the lighting is always good," Mr. Howard suggested innocently.

Marissa nodded at him, then redirected her attention back to Pam. "It's a very simple fix. I swear I won't hurt you."

Pam's face softened a little. "Okay, let's sew this baby up. I've got stuff to do tonight, can't be bleeding all over the place."

Marissa smiled, happily, at her and led Pam out of the room, stopping only to pick up her first aid kit. Mr. Howard watched them go with a smile. He still wasn't sure if his part of the plan would help cause the fall of iCarly, but either way it'd be fun to watch.

* * *

><p>"Maybe we could call it Bloodlight!" Carly suggested brightly.<p>

Sam wrinkled her nose at the suggestion and Freddie shook his head. The vampire parody had been Sam's idea, but Carly was the one who had taken off with the idea, writing a script and nearly obsessing over the video.

Despite Carly's enthusiasm, and her role as a cowgirl who wanted his character as a boyfriend, Freddie was not looking forward to doing the parody. His vampire character was ridiculous and fun to play, but he knew all the guys, and Sam, would make fun of after it was over. He knew it was a stupid reason to be so against the parody, but he was sick of being mocked for everything he did, and feeling like a loser.

Carly hummed softly under her breath. "How about Twi-Blood Diaries?" her white teeth flashed in the dimming light as she smiled again. Freddie's mom was at the first ever Ridgeway Parents Meeting so the trio was making their way to the Groovy Smoothie as the sun was dropping, sometime his mother never allowed. Spencer didn't care as long as they weren't stupid, and Sam's mom didn't even know the location of her daughter, much less what she was doing, and probably didn't care.

"I like the Twi-Blood part," Sam told Carly, lying easily. Freddie nodded at Sam's fib in agreement and Carly rewarded them with a bright smile.

"Awesome! Okay, we kind of have a name, the script's done, Freddie's new software is ready and we have all the costumes and props. Looks like we can start filming tomorrow!" Carly grinned again at the two. Sam smiled back, but Freddie only offered a weak nod.

"Freddie what's wrong? You've barely talked all night," Carly asked in concern, putting a hand on his shoulder. Next to him Sam let out a quiet groan at his dramatics. He burst.

"I don't want to be a stupid vampire! Everyone's going to laugh at me and I'm going to look like an idiot!' he thrown his hands up in the air and he brought them back down, switching his tone from frustrated to pleading, "Can't Sam be the vampire? She acts like more of a guy then most males our age!"

Abruptly Freddie lost balance thanks to a hard push from Sam. He stumbled and tripped, leaning to the right and succumbing to gravity. At that moment T-Bo's bike messenger, who delivered him notes from his great aunt, collided with Freddie, swerving in time to not hit Freddie directly, but still hitting him on the side. The bike had been going top speed and Freddie landed on it hard.

The force was strong enough to send Freddie flying backwards a foot or two, the left side of his head smacking into the fire hydrant, blocking out the sounds of the bike messenger crashing to the side of him. Moaning Freddie fell to his knees, then hit the pavement, his right side no embedded with tiny pebbles and bumps.

Faintly he heard Sam frantically saying his name and Carly freaking out to someone on her cellphone. Then the sound of footsteps, then nothing. His right ear was fine, he was sure, just muffled by the pavement, but his left ear felt hot and warm, and heard nothing from it. It was a terrifying feeling and he moaned in fright when he felt a hand on his head. Or at least he assumed he did. Truth be told he couldn't exactly hear what he was doing. Freddie opened his eyes and saw Carly kneeling next to him, head cocked to the side, cellphone glued to her ear as she attempted to wake him. Freddie didn't focus on Carly though, standing behind her was Sam, her arms hung limply at the sides, and a fearful and confused look in her wide eyes. Freddie stayed focused her till the ambulance came, for seven blissful minutes hearing nothing of the outside world, and seeing nothing but Sam, with Carly's worried face occasionally blocking his view. The last thing he saw before they got him off the ground was Sam saying something. He couldn't hear her when she was doing it, but it seemed like she was saying sorry, over and over again.

As the ambulance doors slammed shut and the sounds of the world began to return to Freddie's ears, he mused over what he'd seen. Sam couldn't have been saying sorry, because she despised him and only apologized every few years.

She wasn't sorry for hurting her worst enemy, right?

* * *

><p><strong>Any theories on what will happen? What'd you think of the chapter? Got a tumblr? Tell me everything in a review!<strong>


	2. I'd Pay to See You Frown

**Another chapter! I'll try to have one out every week, around Monday or Tuesday. **

**Thank you as always to KingxLeon21 for my beta, and being one of my only reviewers! I know this story isn't going to get much attention so all your reviews really mean a lot. **

**Title comes from The Ballad of Mona Lisa by Panic! At The Disco **

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><p>"And cut!" Gibby called out from behind the massive camera, "Nice job! That was the last shot!"<p>

The idiot farmgirl, the moustached cowboy, and the angsty vampire, all cheered enthusiastically.

Having filmed their scenes out of order, they had just finished filming the opening scene. After nearly two weeks of: planning, practicing and filming they were finally done. Needless to say, all four were very happy about that and looked forward to moving on as quickly as possible.

As the cheering died down, Carly tossed off her hat. "What do you guys say to smoothies after we get out of these stupid clothes? On me!"

"Yes!" shouted Sam.

"Si!" chorused Freddie.

"For Narnia!" Gibby declared. A silence fell over the group.

"For Narnia?" questioned Carly.

Gibby nodded. "Duh." Upon saying that, he then turned and walked out of the room, humming the Mario Theme song as he did so. Sam had to hand it to him; that kid had swag.

Carly made her confused face, then her accepting the weird face, and turned to Freddie. "I'll go grab my makeup wipes so we can get that gunk off your face."

"Thanks." Freddie smiled at Carly, then flopped into a red beanbag, succumbing to the exhaustion caused by overplaying an angsty teen vampire.

Sam mimicked his movement as Carly left the studio, stretching out and settling into the plush a few feet from Freddie. For some reason she couldn't stop looking at the nerd. Lately her eyes had been glued to him without permission from her brain. She was noticing things as a result, things she didn't want to notice. For instance she realized his stupid haircut was actually kind of cute and showed off his soft brown eyes that looked so gentle, even when she was pissing him off and he was at the height of his fury.

He groaned softly and Sam felt her entire tired body perk up. She unconsciously moved towards him as he took off his jacket and stretched out his arms. _His arms. Oh god. _What happened to the weak little kid who could barely hold one of his beloved cameras with his tiny arms. This hunk had gorgeous, defined arms.

Sam gave herself a hard mental slap upon realizing she'd internally referred to Freddie as a hunk. On top of that horror, she felt an overwhelming urge to grab one of Freddie's delicious arms, look him right in his beautiful face and tell him how sorry she was. He hadn't heard her pathetic apology before; too busy cuddling pavement. Sure there was no visible damage, but the doctor said Freddie suffered slight hearing damage and his right ear might never be perfect again. Sam briefly pondered why she felt so guilty; maybe she was realizing how good Freddie was, and knowing there was a chance she'd break him so bad that he'd never be good again.

He was still good though, he couldn't even stay mad at the whole ambulance ride. Sam and Carly had arrived at the hospital to find him defending Sam against his mother's accusations, even going as far to tell her to leave the room for a little while so she could calm down.

"Who don't you hate me?" Sam blurted, the question coming out on its own accord.

He leaned back and grinned at her, "I never said I don't hate you."

Sam rolled her eyes at his attempt to be clever, "I mean, why don't you hate me for the ear thing." She gestured awkwardly at his head.

"Oh." Freddie tugged gently on said ear and Sam resisted the urge to leap over and do the same. "I dunno, you're always mean to me, but we're always going to be friends."

Sam tried to not completely melt at Freddie's words, and failed mostly, sinking back into her beanbag chair at his words. "Yeah, but this time was different. I caused permanent damage to your body."

Freddie shrugged. "Wasn't the first time. Didn't seem worth it to stay mad."

Sam nodded again and a moment of silence passed, then Sam spoke again. "You're good Freddie. Really… just, plain, good." She ducked her head at this and instantly despised her lame words, but Freddie smiled.

"Thanks Sam," he replied in a humble little voice. Silence fell again.

Carly burst into the room after that, complaining that her makeup remover wipes had been in Spencer's room and soon after Carly, Gibby entered in full cardboard body armor. Chaos ensued, of course, but eventually they made it to the Groovy Smoothie, Sam in her untucked cowboy shirt, Freddie in vampire garb minus the makeup, Carly wearing her farmgirl outfit without the hat, and Gibby in his cardboard suit, racing around the shop declaring the unicorns were ready for battle and other stupid shit like that. It gave Sam an excuse to punch him in the gut a couple of times, but when Freddie started fangirling over a new line of cameras for sale at the electronics place next door, Sam just rolled her eyes. She probably should have abused him a little, but she was still a tad worried she'd wreck another part of that perfect boy.

* * *

><p>Pam flopped down on her faded turquoise couch, swinging her legs up and hooking them on the top, scratching her new rash passionately, as she settled down. Normally her routine before her boyfriend of the week came home was to sleep in, eat breakfast, go on tumblr, have a nap, put lotion on her rash, eat lunch, have a nap, shop online, have a bath, reapply lotion and then watch tv until Charles or Ryan or whatever his name was showed up with supper. Today she'd messed up her whole routine by sleeping past breakfast, tumblr time, and nap time, and then when she woke up the bumps on her arm were so irritating that she'd spent all day itching, eating, and slathering lotion on her rash. Nothing, however, would make her miss TV time.<p>

Pam let her head flop down, grabbing the remote and watching TV upside down for all of three minutes. She tried to focus on 1000 Ways to Die, she really did. It was her favourite show; always providing the perfect inspiration on how to spend her weekends. Today her mind kept wandering, and even when a man accidentally opened an umbrella that was shoved down his throat, Pam was thinking of Marissa. Eventually she ignored the TV show altogether and let herself slip into a flashback from the previous night.

_"So, do you have any exciting changes to propose for the school?" Marissa's hand remained tightly pressed to Pam's as they made their way to the chemistry lab, and the blonde was desperately trying to ignore the excited little tingles she felt running through her hand. _

_"Not really. I just came for the men and free coffee," Pam replied casually._

_"Oh…" Marissa's short reply trailed off into an awkward silence that lasted until the chemistry lab. _

_Upon arriving Marissa never took pressure off Pam's hand as she opened the door, turned on the lights and set up her first aid kit. It was strange for Pam, having someone taking care of her and be concerned about her wellbeing. Sure, she had a string of boyfriends that clothed and fed her, but they didn't care about her, to them she was just free sex. _

_"I know you said you wouldn't hurt me, but from my experience needles hurt," Pam said warily, breaking the silence and causing Marissa to look up from the needle she was threading. _

_"Tell you what Pam," her voice was extremely gentle and comforting, "You just look at my face while I do this. You'll see how calm I am, because I've done this millions of times, and it'll put you at ease." _

_Pam nodded uncertainly and fixed her eyes on Marissa. The redhead finished preparing the wound for stitching, then pricked Pam's skin with the sharp needle. Pam winced at the pain, but didn't pull her eyes away from her nurse. She watched the beautiful, outstanding eyes that were brown with green woven in dart back and forth as Marissa carefully watched her stitching. Then Pam swept her eyes down to Marissa's lips that were relaxed in an easy smile, causing Pam to smile and relax herself. Lastly she examined the red hair that captured the light and looked extremely soft and shiny. Pam resisted the overwhelming urge to reach out and pet Marissa on the head like a kitten. Where did that ugly Freddie kid get his looks from? His mom was **hot**! _

_"There, done." Marissa's warm tone broke Pam's concentration and the two women looked each other in the eyes, doing nothing but staring for a few moments. _

_"Uh, thanks," Pam finally stumbled, moving backwards._

_Marissa jumped a little back too. "Oh, it was no trouble."_

_Shortly after that Marissa received a phone call from the hospital, informing her that Freddie was in the hospital with a bleeding ear and possible hearing loss. Pam had never seen a women move so fast, and the redhead was soon gone, leaving Pam alone, with a perfectly stitched up finger. _

Now, abusing her furniture and watching TV, Pam's mind was still in the chemistry lab. She, absentmindedly, ran her fingers over the harsh black thread, then, moved down to her wrist to scratch furiously. Her apartment seemed suddenly empty and lonely, and for reasons she didn't understand, Pam longed for the company of the redheaded nurse.

* * *

><p>"Smile." Missy smirked as she tossed a handheld video camera at Nevel, his clumsy coordination skills forgotten by his instinctive reaction to electronics in danger. He managed to secure a grip on it, just as gravity had nearly won.<p>

"Why would you do that?" he squeaked, "How dare you handle an electronic device like that! This is not one of those silly footballs your boyfriend throws around while you wave pom poms!" his fingers curled protectively around the camcorder.

Missy shrugged, not at all disturbed by his scolding. "I have the first part of your job ready. Are _you _ready?"

"Of course," Nevel snapped briskly. Missy rolled her eyes at the blonde boy. His dramatic attitude and high, nasally voice was already getting on her nerves. Why did that boy believe he even ever stood a chance with Carly?

"Good. Keep your coat on, we're going shopping." Before Nevel could protest, and he opened his mouth to do so, Missy grabbed his shoulders and turned him around, pushing him towards the door that was still open from his arrival.

The first minutes of the car ride were spent in silence, before Nevel spoke.

"Are you going to enlighten me on the details of your genius plan now?" it was evident he was annoyed and Missy detected a hint of sarcasm in his voice.

Shaking her glossy, perfectly curled, red hair; a smug smile crept onto Missy's face. "What's Carly deathly allergic to, that will cause her to nearly stop breathing if she only touches them?

"Bread and butter pickles," Nevel replied instantly.

"Exactly." Missy ignored the creepiness of Nevel's quick answer, keeping her voice calm. "So we are going to make a little video. In it you are going to apologize for being so mean to the iCarly crew, and then you're going to start a shopping trip where you will buy supplies for a peace picnic. After that we'll also film you giving them the basket of food, making sure that you hand Carly the pickles personally, because you heard they were her favourite."

Nevel's eyes lit up with realization. "Naturally she will react badly to such a horrifying gift, and overreact knowing that drama queen, which you'll have on tape, and upload online, exposing her as a bratty diva!" Missy nodded at Nevel's conclusion, ignoring the irony of _him_ calling her former best friend a diva.

Once iCarly was in hot water for being snobby to someone who just appeared to be making peace the friends would become upset and frustrated with each other, and with her team working their magic, everything should fall apart, according to her plan.

Shopping went quickly. Missy filmed Nevel giving his opening speech in front of the store and she followed him around as he collected items meant for a "Grandeur Picnic of Forgiveness and Tranquility". Needless to say, Nevel had come up with the name.

The entire charade was going according plan until they got to the pickle section and Missy found herself with ten minutes of Nevel screaming shamelessly at a little girl, after she bumped into him, making him drop and break the pickles he'd been holding. To be fair, they were the last of the bread and butter pickles, and absolutely necessary to their plan, but Missy stayed back and let Nevel do her dirty work. Now she had golden, career ruining footage of him verbally abusing a little girl, and physically abusing her rainbow lollipop.

"Whatcha doing, baby?" Chuck's voice came from behind her, startling her out of her musing.

Missy smiled at the younger boy. He was cute, and if she had to pretend she wanted to date him so he'd help her, then so be it.

"Nothing babe. Is it time to watch the new Johnny Test already?" Chuck was fantastic at web design and live video streaming, and she needed someone with those skills to help her carry out the real plan.

When she lost Carly to Sam she wasn't just losing her best friend, who really was, rightfully, hers first. Missy knew she had also lost the chance to be a webstar on iCarly. Ever since she was little, Missy had wanted to be famous, and have millions of people love her and hang onto her every word. Sure, she could start her own webshow right now, but Missy knew that she wasn't going to get anywhere until iCarly came crashing down and people needed something new to watch. If she took Nevel down, even more people would turn to her. It was maybe a little early to destroy Nevel's career, but if she released the footage now, there was a whole new way Nevel could pull apart the iCarly trio.

Chuck's eyes lit up at the mention of Johnny Test, "Yeah, it's on in five, come on!" he grabbed his girlfriend's hand and pulled her towards his couch. She settled down comfortably, faking a pleased smile when Chuck put his arm around her, and allowing a sinister smirk to rest upon her face.

* * *

><p><strong>Did you see that coming? Was Pam's, Missy's or Sam's perspective your favourite?<strong>


	3. Exactly Where You'd Like Me

**Longest chapter yet! Late too, and that's my fault for getting so wrapped up in a book that I forgot the real world existed. The Replacement is an amazing book by the way. **  
><strong>Thank you <em>KingxLeon21<em>, you are quite possibly the fastest beta ever, and you always tell me what I need to fix! :)**

**Song Title comes from But It's Better if You Do by Panic! At The Disco**

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><p>The floor fell out from underneath him. The sky shattered to pieces above him. Hungry winds froze his soul and the blazing sun burnt his body. Everything was out to get him; everything was falling apart. The footage of him screaming at the little girl was online, and now everyone hated him. His career was ruined, his life was over.<p>

Nevel clawed desperately at the screen. "No! NO! Please no!" Being a firm atheists he was unsure of who he was begging to, all he knew was that he wanted someone to swoop in and save him.

For the millionth time, the little girl began cry onscreen and Nevel winced, pausing the video and turning off the monitor so he wouldn't have to look at it anymore. With over a million views, the video was going viral rapidly, and both the little girl's tears and the jumping views were disturbing him.

Nevel's phone began to vibrate and ring loudly. He glanced down at the Caller ID, a raging heat filling him when he saw the name of the one person who could have done this to him, the one person who knew about it, and had footage. He snatched his phone up.

"MISSY!"

"Nevel! Nevel! Ohmygosh Nevel I'm so sorry!" Good, she already felt remorse for what she'd done. Nevel reveled in Missy's watery voice. "My older brother! He's such a jerk! He hates you so much, and he found the video and uploaded it to Splashface! I'm so sorry Nevel, I would have stopped him if I had known!"

Nevel cooled a little, but didn't let his guard down. "Remove the video then."

"I don't know his password or anything, but I'll try to bargain with him and figure out his password, I'll get it down I swear." Missy's words came out jumbled, and she still sounded on the edge of tears, as if she was afraid Nevel would abandon her and their plan.

"How can I be sure it wasn't you, Missy?" his voice was back to his calm, normal one.

Missy sniffled dramatically, "I'm on your side, Nevel! In all of this, I want you to win, because I'll win! You're the most important part of this team, I would never risk losing you!"

Nevel felt quite satisfied with Missy's words. What she said was true; he was the brains of the operation and a key player in executing it. She'd have to be a total moron to risk his sanity.

"Do you believe me?" Missy's voice wavered at Nevel's silence.

"Yes Missy, I believe you," he assured her quietly, his heart still heavy with his impending doom.

"Oh thank goodness!" Missy's sweet, concerned voice dripped through the phone, "Are you still on my side Nevel? Are we still in this together?"

Nevel rolled his eyes, "Of course we are, Missy."

"Awesome! You should come over right away. We'll figure out my brother's password, and maybe we can use this incident to help our plan to take down iCarly!"

Nevel responded, sullenly, to her peppy attitude, nevertheless making his way to Missy's. The trip was terrible. On the way to the bus stop, he drank from a juice box, hoping that his favourite organic beverage would perk him up.

It didn't.

He continued to stumble through the streets with his hair in a mess, clutching to his juice; truly a perfect poster child for hitting rock bottom.

At the bus stop a lady walked away so she wouldn't have to sit near him, a man gave him his very own Seattle rain shower via a garden hose and he had a disgusting bag of French fries thrown at him. On the bus, Nevel wallowed in self pity, receiving glares from everyone on the bus, and the driver made him get off four blocks away from Missy's house. He doubted the thought that, going to see the peppy redhead would actually make him feel better, but if there was a chance to hack her brother's account it would be worth it, and he couldn't bear to stare at the computer screen anymore.

By the time he arrived at Missy's apartment, she was nearly exploding with a new plot. It was simple, yet elegant. Nevel had to admit he was in awe, and also extremely irritated that she had thought of it before he could.

The first step was to go and beg forgiveness from the iCarly crew. Once he had convinced them he felt like a terrible person and felt truly sorry, he would ask them to aid him of getting the world's forgiveness. Once the past was dealt with, Nevel would really start on the heart of the plan.

He'd befriend Carly, become close with her, spend a lot of time with her and get her to feel comfortable around him and be open with him. In the meantime, Missy would find a way to keep Sam, Freddie, and Gibby otherwise occupied. Slowly, Nevel would pull Carly away from them, and build up her trust.

Lastly, the rest of his team would create a situation where Carly needed to pick Nevel over her other friends. Even if it was for something small, they would feel betrayed, and the four of them could step to the side and watch their enemies crumble.

"Oh, and Nevel," Missy's innocent voice caught him at the door when he went to leave, as did her fingers latching into his shoulder, "You don't have feelings for Carly anymore, right?"

Nevel kept his voice brisk, "I never actually harboured feelings for Carly Shay, I was just infatuated with her looks. Nothing but the crush of a silly little boy."

Missy released her fingers, "Good." Her speech reminded him of winter; crisp, cold, and sharp.

Nevel walked out the door quickly, telling himself it was because he had a plan to set in motion. A louder voice drowned that out, predicting that what he'd just said to Missy was the first of many lies he'd tell tonight.

Freddie glared at the disgusting pig tied up on Carly's couch, legs and arms in the air. He was pleading his case, but it was clear only Carly was listening. Gibby remained engrossed in his pudding, while Sam and himself were too absorbed in their hatred for the blonde boy. Maybe it was petty and stupid, but Freddie didn't appreciate Nevel trying to take advantage of one of his friends and messing up his website, making him look like a colossal idiot on his part. He was the man of the friendship, sorry Gibby, wasn't he supposed to protect them and the webshow, and other sexist stuff like that?

Sam was obviously the defender though, and had done good work. From the moment he'd shown up at the door, Nevel spent no more than half a second free. Sam leapt on him within a second of his arrival, yelling at Freddie to find some rope as she did so. He obeyed quickly. Not surprisingly, Spencer had some extra rope lying around, and handed it over to Sam. She had Nevel tied up and on the couch, helpless, in three seconds flat. Freddie found himself more impressed with Sam's behavior than normal. Maybe with all the acts of violence against him Freddie forgot how hard Sam would fight anyone who threatened iCarly.

When Nevel was untied, at Carly's request, and swearing that he was sorry, Freddie tried to believe him. Nevel said he felt terrible for hurting the little girl, that it made him realize he was a terrible person, and he wanted to earn theirs, the little girl's, and the world's forgiveness. He sounded heartfelt enough, but Freddie couldn't bring himself to buy it. Nevel sounded too innocent. Either way it didn't matter; Carly was buying, always quick to see the best in people. He glanced at Sam, her eyes set in a frown, and a devilish smile forming on her face. Well at least _she _was on his side.

"You wanna prove it?" Sam challenged, tugging off her shoe, "See this sneaker? My foot's been sweating in it for over a year." Freddie wrinkled his nose in disgust and mentally noted to trick Sam into letting him buy her new shoes.

"Now…" Sam continued, turning around in her seat to grab something, "Here's a half drunk can of Wahoo Punch," she paused and dumped the punch into her shoe. Freddie grimaced, and Sam thrust the shoe in front of Nevel. "Drink it!"

Nevel recoiled immediately, "Oh my God!"

Carly smirked in a very Sam-like fashion. "You wanna prove you're sincere?"

"Then drink from the shoe." Freddie finished in his vampire voice, earning a glare from Sam. He felt his shoulders drop a little. How come Sam was immune to his vampire charms? Maybe he'd have to try it directly on her in order for them to work.

"This Wahoo Punch, is it organic?" Nevel questioned, peering into the dark abyss of Sam's footwear.

"Just drink it!" snapped Sam.

Nevel had a final moment of hesitation, before a determined look came over his face and he grabbed the shoe, chugging back the liquid. Freddie grinned hugely and resisted the urge to congratulate Sam on her wicked plan. He was doubtless that she was pleased enough with herself, particularly when Nevel nearly choked on a dead cricket.

After that, they discussed plans to make Nevel less hated, and eventually agreed that creamed corn and free smoothies seemed like a pretty good way to go. Freddie wasn't much help to the conversation, seeing as the whole time was wondering if his vampire voice didn't turn Sam into a mushy, flowery girl, then what did? Ever since she'd shoved him in front of that bike for nearly calling her a boy, Freddie had been more curious what made Sam act like a girl. He knew some boys quite literally did, like when she got dolled up for Pete, but he was more curious about something small, some little trick that could make Samantha Puckett melt. The first thing that came to mind was compliments, and it wasn't very likely, but Freddie figured he'd have a go at it on his way out anyways.

Things had wrapped up, and everyone was drifting off. Nevel had left, Gibby was gone long before him to get pudding. Carly was putting away food from the party, and Sam had flopped out on the couch. Freddie stood and walked to the door, hesitating when he got there, unsure of how to compliment someone who often abused him for saying the wrong thing. Taking a relaxing breath Freddie decided that honesty would be his best bet.

Discreetly he let his eyes roam her body, trying not to be creepy, but quickly finding many admirable features. However, complimenting her on something like the pretty little patch of skin between her shirt, and jeans, would earn him a black eye. Finally, he decided on her hair. It really did look nice, even when thrown chaotically against the pillow she was lying on. And in theory most girls liked to be told their hair looked and/or smelt nice.

Ignoring the fact that Sam wasn't most girls, he turned to say bye to Carly, then called on her, "Hey Sam." His voice was casual, hoping to get her attention.

"What?" her head didn't turn from the T.V.

"Your hair looks nice today."

She snapped her head towards him and narrowed her eyes. "What's your game, Benson?"

Freddie shrugged. "No game, you just look… nice. Thought you might like to hear it."

"I would've rather gotten a pie," Sam informed him breezily, turning back to the T.V.

Freddie sighed as he left the apartment, quickly entering his own. It seemed as if complimenting Sam was a bust. Freddie was so wrapped up in his own musings that when he flopped down on his own couch he didn't even notice his mother repeatedly calling his name.

Marissa felt her heart stop beating. "Freddie! Fredward!" she called frantically again.

Her boy sat on the couch, staring off into space, and evidently not hearing his mother.

"FREDWARD BENSON!" she shrieked. He jumped and turned around.

"What mom? What's wrong?" he asked in concern, noticing the tears welling up in her eyes.

"That rotten Sam Puckett," Marissa muttered darkly, "And her no good mother Pam Puckett."

"Mom!" Freddie admonished.

"You couldn't hear me Freddie! And it's because that wretched girl pushed you in front of that bike and caused you permanent hearing loss!"

"No, Mom-" Freddie started to protest.

Mrs. Benson cut him off, "Stop it Freddie. I know the truth, and I'm going to give that Pam Puckett a piece of my mind!"

Freddie started to protest again, but his mother had already snatched up her purse and stormed out the door. She stomped her way to the car, glowered the entire trip, and pounded the pavement up to Pam's doorstep. Once she'd arrived, she knocked violently and when Pam answered the door Marissa's anger broke free.

"You are a horrifying parent! It's because of you and your gutter girl that my beautiful boy can't hear properly! She damaged him, and he's going to be damaged for the rest of his life!"

Pam's expression turned from surprised to furious. "Sam is not a gutter girl! Just because we don't have much money doesn't make her less of a person," Pam snapped.

"You're right," Marissa said coolly, "It's the fault of the _parent_! If you weren't such a terrible mother your daughter wouldn't go around pushing my son in front of oncoming traffic!" Marissa's eyes were wild, and she felt her anger escalating.

"The nub probably deserved it," Pam hissed.

"No boy deserves to be stuck around a demon such as your daughter!" Marissa shot back, regretting the words the moment they left her mouth.

Pam looked shocked, then furious, then devastated all in the three seconds before the door was slammed in Marissa's face.

Marissa stumbled back a couple of steps, her heart heavy with regret. She had never intended to say such awful things about Sam. The girl really wasn't all bad. She cared deeply for her friends, as Marissa recalled how concerned she was when Freddie got hit by the taco truck. Certainly more concerned than Carly Shay, who was too busy putting her lips all over poor Freddie's face. On top of that, Marissa had noticed a violent rash up both Pam's arms. She was certain she had the correct lotion for it in her travel size first aid kit in her vehicle.

Mind made up, Marissa walked back to her car and grabbed her first aid kit, then toted the small suitcase back up the path to Pam's house, ringing the doorbell.

"Go away," Came Pam's muffled voice.

"Please let me in Pam. I want to apologize." Marissa pressed closer to the door in hopes of communicating better.

"Don't want your stupid apology." Even from outside Marissa could hear Pam itching harshly.

"I have some lotion for your rash," she offered.

The door opened a crack and a single red hand poked through. "Give it here," Pam demanded.

"It can only be administered by a registered nurse." Marissa lied. She was worried this bottle of lotion was the only thing that could bring Pam to forgive her.

Pam sighed. "Fine. Come in." The door swung open to reveal Pam with two entirely red and bumpy arms.

"Oh my goodness!" Marissa sprang forward, "Pam, what happened?"

Pam shrugged. "I dunno. I cut through the park the night after you stitched me up and it's been like this ever since!"

"Probably poison ivy," Marissa murmured, moving forward to examine it closer. "May I?" she asked the blonde, gesturing to the bumps.

Pam swallowed and nodded, closing the door behind Marissa, then leading her to the living room a few feet away. Marissa took the house in as she entered, noticing that there seemed to be only one hallway. On the left, there were three doors, presumably a bathroom and two bedrooms. On her right were two bigger rooms, each with arches rather than doors. It wasn't dirty enough to cause her to tense up, but she would love to give the place a good clean.

At that moment, they were in the living room, with windowed space looking into the kitchen and dining room. Most everything was some shade of blue, with lots of various, un-matching floral patterns, and knick knacks everywhere.

Pam draped herself on the couch. Marissa sat next to her and began to unload her first aid kit, working until she found her calamine lotion. The entire time Pam maintained a steady glare directed toward Marissa.

"Found it!" Marissa said cheerfully. Pam continued to glower.

"Look Pam, I am so sorry for what I said. I never should have criticized Sam. She cares very much for my Freddie, even if she doesn't always show it."

Pam relaxed a little and stopped glaring. "Thanks," she murmured softly.

"May I?" Marissa held up the bottle of lotion. Pam nodded and held out her arms.

Marissa quickly put a dab of lotion on her fingertips, then scooted forward to shorten the distance between the two. The moment she pressed her cool fingers on Pam's fiery skin the blonde let out a soft, sensual moan, causing both women to blush.

"Sorry," muttered Pam.

"Perfectly alright," Marissa assured her, recovering, "This lotion feels fantastic on your poor skin I'm sure." Marissa began to rub the lotion all over both of Pam's arms, half hoping she'd make that noise again. Silence engulfed them after a few seconds.

"I really do want to be a good mother," Pam said softly, surprising Marissa, "I just don't know how."

Marissa stopped her work and looked deep into the sad, uncertain, but still painfully beautiful eyes of her companion. "I believe you," she whispered softly.

A small smile crept onto Pam's face before she ducked her head, "Thanks Marissa."

Mrs. Benson continued in silence, gently massaging the lotion in until the pink gunk was all over Pam's arms. As she packed up her things Pam remained on the couch. Both were lost in thought.

"Um, Pam," Marissa broke the silence this time, "How about tomorrow I come over for the day and we watch some movies about parenting and I can give you some tips. Plus, I'll be able to keep putting lotion on your bumps."

Pam smiled up at the redhead. "Sounds like fun. I'll be there."

Marissa laughed lightly, and gathered up the rest of her belongings, spending the drive home feeling like she was soaring on a cloud.

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><p><strong>You should definitely review because I ran a mile before posting this and it was exhausting so I deserve something for all that hard work, right? :)<strong>


	4. My One and Lonely

**Okay so this is the chapter before really, it's quite important a lot of things are brought to light and next chapter a lot of things explode**

**Thank you kingxleon21, hartful13, and my lovely reviewers! Sorry this chapter was late. I'm try to get another one out before Christmas break, but I work a lot this week so it might be a couple of days late. **

**Chapter title comes from Northern Downpour by Panic! At The Disco**

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><p>She should hate him, because even though Carly Shay does not hate, she has always found a cold place in her heart for Nevel Papperman. She hated him before, but now, after he destroyed everything they worked so hard to help him gain, she couldn't hate him. Even though he took his anger out on some poor, innocent, African American man in a wheelchair, who even offered to buy him a smoothie after bumping into him. But the cold place was gone, she sourly noted, and instead of anger, she was left with hurt.<p>

Carly let herself be pulled to the couch by Sam, still a little numb after witnessing the video. Her friends didn't understand why Carly was acting odd, but Sam put on Girly Cow and Freddie watched in concern.

She didn't know why Nevel destroying himself, again, hurt her so badly either. Part of her was caring too much about Nevel, and another part was hurt that he'd turn around and wreck what they'd help him build. She felt so used, and naïve. While he'd been having another temper tantrum Carly was thinking about how; maybe they could be friends with Nevel, and he could continue to be this better person she liked a lot more. Settling into her couch, Carly flashed back to yesterday, when Nevel had been sitting there, and she had started to believe he wasn't all bad.

_"Over 800,000 views," Sam pointed out._

_"But over 96% of the comments are negative," added Freddie dejectedly._

_Sam gestured to the screen. "Look at that one."_

_Carly read it aloud, "'Stupid video. Nevel's still the worst person alive.'"._

_Nevel groaned in agony on the couch, repeating the sound when Carly and Sam read two more of the vicious comments. _

_Ignoring Spencer and his counting of screws that only momentarily distracted them, Nevel despaired "Everyone still hates me."_

_"Guess our video just made people think Nevel was trying to do damage control," Carly added. She for one really believed that Nevel had potential. There was good in everyone, and she just knew that Nevel was a nice person deep down. _

_Spencer offered his advice, but the iCarly crew wisely ignored it, causing Spencer to start pouting to himself. Back on the couch, Nevel started to complain of the spins and Carly came to talk to him. She pulled her knees up on the couch, sitting closer than she normally would. With this new Nevel, she was more trusting. _

_"It's going to be okay," she said reasonably. _

_"No it's not!" Nevel said in anguish, pushing the laptop closed, "No one's ever going to believe that I truly feel bad about what I did." _

_Carly felt her heart go out to the poor boy. "I bet people will believe you if you tell them that." _

_That's when everything changed. Nevel looked up from his laptop and right at her. His look was a million things; awe, hope, regret, hurt, worry, and innocence. There was something beautiful in those broken brown eyes, and Carly let herself get locked in them. _

_The moment was cut short by Spencer rubbing butter on his face, and Carly broke away from the hold. _

Happy images flashed on the T.V., while dark ones flashed in Carly's mind. She'd though Nevel's apology on their show was genuine, and it had truly touched her at the time.

_"Good evening. My name is Nevel Amadeus Papperman. I stand before you to sincerely apologize for the inexcusable…" It had started off just so… Nevel; the careful, well spoken boy that restrained from human emotions. "In…inexcusable…" But then the real Nevel broke free._

_"I hate the way I yelled at that little girl. I don't know why I acted like that." His voice was so sincere, so regretful that Carly felt her casual façade melting. "But I know it was really, really wrong. I apologize. And…I just wish I could apologize to that little girl." _

_Oh praise Sam's spy skills and Freddie's hacking skills that had led them to that little girl. Carly spoke off camera to Nevel, anticipating that she was about to witness something beautiful. She cued the little girl, named Molly. _

_It **was** beautiful. In that couple of minutes she had never seen someone act to honestly. Nevel crumbled, and all that remained was a beautiful boy, a beautiful little girl, and a beautiful moment that left Carly nearly crying in Sam's arms. She'd never witnessed such a transformation, and it made her want to throw her arms around Nevel and hug him as tightly as possible. _

Now, it was clear that she was an idiot. She'd been so completely moved by Nevel's stupid performance, when it was all just an act. Nevel hadn't changed, Nevel wasn't different. He still went around screaming at innocent people and being a complete hobknocker!

"Hey, Carls? I'm gonna go grab the fried chicken I left upstairs, alright?"

"Okay." Carly put on a fake smile for her friend. Sam returned it with a small one and hurried upstairs. It was then Carly noticed she was alone. Freddie must have left without her noticing.

Carly returned her attention to the T.V. for all of three seconds before there was a knock at the door. Assuming it was Freddie she called "It's open!"

The door was timidly pushed open to reveal a disheveled Nevel Papperman.

"What do you want?" Carly asked icily.

"I am a complete idiot," Nevel whispered softly.

"I agree completely. Now please leave." Carly got off the couch and marched up to Nevel. "iCarly is done with you."

Nevel looked up, his brown eyes burning fiercely on his sorrowful face. "But you're not."

Carly recoiled slightly. "Yes I am!" she countered hopelessly. They both knew he was right. She still knew there was a good side to Nevel, and she wanted to find it.

Carly looked over her shoulder at the stairs. "Can we talk?" asked Nevel brokenly.

She deliberated for a moment. "Fine, come this way." Carly started walking towards the back door of the apartment, Nevel hot on her heels. There she quietly opened the door, then slipped away with Nevel.

Sam knew her best friend was too nice for her own good. Nevel's entire pity party had been nothing but a show to play with Carly's emotions. After the trio saw the video of him screaming at the man in the wheelchair Carly looked significantly depressed. Sam didn't try to understand it, just offered her Peppy Cola and pulled her onto the couch to watch Girly Cow. Freddie left soon after.

On the bright side, she wasn't having anymore stupid, nubby thoughts about him. The dork had been so annoying that day, from squealing about girls finally noticing he existed, to trying his vampire voice on her and Carly like he was still expecting Carly to realize her love for him and collapse in his arms. On top of that, he had the nerve to date one of the skanks, completely oblivious to the fact they only liked him because of the stupid voice and would dump his sorry butt when they found out how much of a dork he really was.

Which was, exactly, why Sam was not pleased to have Freddie sitting across from her with a mopey expression, looking sadly into space. He was the perfect person to play a vampire, seeing how dramatic he was.

"So…" Sam trailed off awkwardly, unsure of why Freddie had barged into Carly's apartment when he was still supposed to be on a date with a vampire bewitched slut.

"I got dumped," Freddie slunk further into the chair, "For Gibby."

Sam winced. "Ouch…"

This was what Carly was for, but Sam had gone upstairs for three freaking seconds, then came back to find a text on her phone from Carly that said "Brb" and a pouty vampire wannabe in her place. Not a good trade; not at all.

"Why don't girls ever want me?" Freddie's voice was getting seriously annoying and Sam rolled her eyes at the kid. He caught the motion and snapped.

"I'm serious Sam! That girl only went on a date with me because of my stupid vampire voice! I'm completely unattractive to the female population!" He'd risen forward in his rant and now flopped back dejectedly.

"Maybe you could try the male population." Sam half joked, earning a sharp glare from Freddie. Personally, she found it a pretty amusing joke.

Freddie pushed himself up from the chair. "Obviously I shouldn't have bothered coming. Thanks a lot Sam." He started for the door.

"Wait, Fredward don't get your panties in a twist." Sam attempted to lure him back to the chair. Freddie turned around with an expectant look on his face.

"Sit down, my boy," Sam said in one of her weird accents, motioning towards the chair. Freddie sighed, but did as he was told.

"Okay, here's the thing," Sam positioned herself so she was directly facing Freddie, "Girls don't want to date you, because you can be a whiney little brat."

"Hey!" Freddie protested, his voice going high and defensive.

Sam shrugged. "It's true. But," she took a deep breath, "You're a good guy Freddie, and you'll find someone you really like, who really likes you too, and not because of some stupid vampire voice." Sam leaned back in the couch, quite pleased with herself.

Freddie's face melted into one of his great smiles. "Thanks Sam, I really needed to hear that. And it means a lot, coming from you." He stood up and opened his arms, "Hug to celebrate this historic moment in our friendship?" He wiggled his eyebrows goofily.

Sam raised her own and laughed lightly, "Thanks Fredditz, but I'll pass. Can't have people know I go around hugging nubs."

Freddie dropped his arms and shrugged, a half smile on his face. "Okay Sam, but I know your secret." He paused dramatically. "You _do _have a soul." Sam stuck her tongue out at him and he smiled back, then turned to head for the door.

It was at that moment Sam realized something that would shake her world; she didn't want Freddie to leave. She wanted him to stay alone in the apartment with her, because she wanted to be that girl Freddie liked, the same one that honestly liked him back. She wanted to do stupid, nubby things in that moment before he left. Like: grab him and kiss him, or force him up against the door and get him to talk in his vampire voice because it was actually kind of hot. Freddie opened the door to the hallway, then he left, leaving Sam alone and changed forever.

As the door swung shut, Sam made a pledge. The kind of pledge that her younger self would have spat at, and given a good punch to whoever suggested it. She would be nicer to Freddie. Not, crazy, Carly nice, but decent, and she would act more like the kind of girl he could like, someone who was just as deserving of him. It would take a lot of hard work, and practically impossible commitment, but Sam was going to win that boy over, even if it took the rest of her high school life.

"Oh my gosh!" Marissa tried to shield her eyes from the horrors for the millionth time that night, but Pam, once again, pried them off. "Come on Marissa, it's no fun if you don't watch the girl being killed in her sleep! Ooooo look her boyfriend's freaking out!"

"Oh my," moaned Marissa, turning her head away.

Pam laughed and tossed a piece of popcorn in her mouth, pleased with the situation. What started as a day full of parenting movies and hour long PowerPoint presentations was ending with popcorn and horror movies.

In fact, only a bowl of popcorn sat between Pam and her lovely redheaded companion. Now, Pam didn't know if she liked girls, or if she liked guys and didn't feel it necessary to label herself with anything. All she understood was that there was a lovely person sitting on her couch that she definitely found attractive, but more than that, she wanted to cuddle and protect said person, actually date them, have conversations, and all that other cheesy chiz.

Her sudden pull to this woman was bad timing. Pam didn't know if Marissa could handle men, let alone a woman. Not that it would stop her; she'd just take it slow. With her cautious plan and hot bod, Pam was sure she'd have at least a chance of winning the heart of Marissa.

She'd have to handle things differently than she normally would. No throwing herself at Marissa's feet, or scaring her by coming on too strong. There was more at risk than just rejection; if she screwed this up Marissa would leave her life, probably forever, and Pam honestly didn't know how she lived with out the incredible redhead in her life before.

"Hey Marissa?" Pam asked casually, gently setting her plan in motion.

"Yes Pam?" Marissa peeked out from her curtain of hair she was using as a barrier between her and the tv.

"Wanna go grab something to eat? There's a really good place just around the corner." After a second Pam added, "Real clean too. Good muffins. Nice place." She gulped anxiously and mentally slapped herself at her pathetic attempt to sound casual.

A piercing scream rang out from the T.V., causing Marissa to shudder. "Sounds excellent. I'll drive."

The drive was short, but Marissa still used the time to lecture Pam on the various horrifying side effects and mental scaring caused by movies such as the one they just watched. Pam pretended to listen obediently, but in reality she was too busy with an unfamiliar warm, happy feeling all over her entire body as she watched the redhead rant about how the minor gore in Nightmare on Elm Street could make them think sadistic thoughts. Being lectured should make her frustrated, bored, and violent, like it had in the past, but instead she was in awe of the simple perfection of Marissa Benson.

At the café, Marissa continued to blabber about the horror of horror movies, and while she was still adorable, Pam really wanted her to shut up and talk about something else.

"Hey Marissa?" Pam interrupted, earning an exasperated look from the woman.

"What is it, Pam? It's very rude to interrupt people, don't forget."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. What do you do with your time besides obsess over cleaning, and Freddie?" Pam hadn't meant the question to be rude, but Marissa looked pretty taken back, and a little offended.

"It's not that I don't like hearing your jabber," Pam added quickly, "Just why don't you talk about something else that interests you."

Marissa sighed, looking a bit unsure. "I don't have any other interests."

Pam's eyebrows shot up in surprise. "Oh."

A silence fell and both nibbled at their foot, before Pam spoke again.

"Well, tell me about something then. Tell me about Freddie's dad," Pam suggested. Marissa instantly looked sad, but she began to talk immediately, taking time to draw out her sentences.

"You're picturing someone perfect aren't you? Some flawless, young man with a good set of morals and values." She chuckled lightly. "He wasn't like that at all."

"What was he like then?" Pam asked, intrigued.

"Charming. Good looking. Passionate. He'd fight to the death for what he believed in. He was the only person who'd stand up to me, but still come to me when he needed help." Marissa was relaxed in her chair, but still kept all of her attention on Pam.

"I think that's why he liked me so much. My parent's were so against us that he had to fight hard to be with me. After high school we took off from our little town and never looked back."

To say Pam was shocked would be a bit of an understatement. Goody two shoes Marissa; taking off with the boy she loved; defying her parents and risking everything she had? It was a whole new side, and instantly Pam was attracted to it.

"What happened?" Obviously this wasn't a fairy tale happy ending, otherwise Pam would not be sitting with Marissa right now.

"He found someone else to fight for." Her voice was distant, traces of hurt in it. "A, pretty, blonde on our street. Then, he was fighting me. I didn't give him a good battle, just left in the night with my things. My shot at revenge." She laughed a little bitterly.

"What about Freddie?" Pam asked softly. It was mind blowing to think that anyone could reject Marissa.

Marissa turned her gaze to Pam, smiling brokenly. "I figured out I was expecting just days after I left. I was in a disgusting little motel, all alone. Eventually I found a small apartment and continued working till I had Freddie. I told him about his son after Freddie was born."

Sensing an oncoming tragedy Pam reached across the table and took Marissa's hand. Marissa wound their fingers together tightly.

"It was too late. He had moved on. Told me to never bother him again." She took a shaky breath, squeezing Pam's fingers. "Sometimes, I worry my Freddie will be like him and leave me, but he would never be so cruel as to abandon his child." Marissa's voice broke a little at the end, sending a stabbing needle through Pam's heart. Without hesitation she stood up and pulled the redhead into her arms, hugging her tightly. Marissa remained frozen for a second, before she loosened and threw her arms around Pam, returning the hug fiercely.

"I'm sorry Marissa. You deserve better. So does Freddie," Pam whispered.

"Thank you," Marissa said softly back.

Later, when Marissa was dropping Pam off at her house, Pam was just about to open the door to leave the car, Marissa spoke up.

"You remind me of him sometimes."

Pam turned and looked Marissa dead in the eye. "I won't ever take off on you or abandon you Marissa, I promise."

Marissa smiled delicately. "Thank you Pam. And thank you for listening to me tonight. I felt surprisingly comfortable opening up to you."

Pam leaned in closer. "Anytime. Maybe we should do this again sometime. I can tell you my sob story," she added with a smile.

"Promise?" Marissa joked lightly.

"Promise."

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><p><strong>Review, lovely person? :)<strong>


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